There are going to be a lot of good speeches you'll hear in your lifetime. Mine will not be one of
them. I might as well start off my speech by telling you all that I'm horrible at speeches, since I'm
going to tell you about myself anyway. Now that that's out of the way, I guess I'll start.
I have never truly been accepted as part of a school community. Nor have I really wanted to be.
Due to an odd condition, I started off my life with an absolutely horrible temper, and a violent
disposition. Needless to say this got me in heaps of trouble at my elementary school in Nevada.
Suffice to say that the teachers, my parents, and me did not see eye to eye. At all. So my parents
made the decision to put me in homeschooling, where they managed to do the best, most efficient
job of botching it as was humanly possible. Nothing against my parents, but they didn't know
anything about running a homeschool.
So after about a year of putting up with my stubborn, asinine behavior, they packed everything up
and moved here to Ames. I started at Sawyer school, under the assumptions that the Ames
district could adapt to anything I threw at them. I put a stop to that theory pretty fast. My next
school was Fellows, where I was placed in the BD program. They handled me better, so I made it
through fourth and fifth grade. Somehow. I continued to be a part of the BD program right up into
sixth grade, where I once again proved my inability to handle school. So my parents put me in
homeschool. I think there's a pattern going here...
They learned a lot from the earlier attempt, and I was homeschooled for the equivalent of two
years. One half of sixth and eighth each, and all of seventh. It was during this time that my parents
found out that the cause of my bad behavior was an allergy to wheat, milk, eggs, and peanuts. It
didn't manifest physically, only behaviorally. Anyway, so after about a year and a half of going
without these, my mom's cousin said she might have the possible cure. Acupuncture. Of course
my imagination instantly filled with needles the size of ice picks protruding from my skin, but when
we started, I got the accupressure treatment instead, which is basically a massage. Very nice deal
out of the whole thing. It's clearly worked, as I am no longer violent or belligerent at school and
can eat all of the foods but peanuts, which we are still working on.
And now my visual. It's a lightbulb, which symbolizes one of my favorite presents from God; my
imagination. Lightbulbs mean ideas, and I have a lot of them, including Anthricids, Vor'Pa, raoni,
and philotic weaponry. I can't really go into those without a lot of technical terms, so I won't try.
Anyway, hopefully this has been around the three-minute mark and I'll get a good grade. Please
remember not to use my speech as an example for the sake of your GPA, and always remember
that.....um.....you should have something deep-sounding prepared in advance or else you'll look
like an idiot like I'm doing.
No comments:
Post a Comment